Loaded Guns - Ursula Andress

Seen for the first time in October 2012.

The primary appeal of this Italian comedy/crime movie is Ursula Andress’s body in various stages of undress. It’s nice enough, but then it seems as if the film makers should have made a bigger commitment to sensuality. The camera never ogles the way we would want it to. Instead we get a commitment to comedic action and the paint-by-numbers plot of a drug war between feuding gangsters.

The best bit is maybe the lecherous, homicidal priest, who’s with the good guys, and also the head villain who has the only funny line: “You outsmarted us all you dirty bitch.” It seems the film-makers know well enough that this sort of movie is often laughed at, so they did their best to produce deliberate laughs. A lot of silly chases and a funny carnival soundtrack. This is at the cost of whatever menace the heavies might have produced. As is, it’s too light to be a suspenseful crime thriller, not funny enough to be a comedy, and not sexy enough to be erotic. Made in the 70’s in Italy and overdubbed in English, maybe it just hasn’t held up well. Grade C.